Why don’t people listen when it comes to horse training?
admin on January 31st, 2010
I have been training arabian show horses for over 25 years.
I am continually frustrated with those people that refuse to take advice as to what their child or horse needs to progress to the next levels of showing.
Some of these clients really see themselves as the "boss". They are paying you, the "employee" to do the job as they see fit. Which is usually not going to work as they don’t know a thing about your job, or what it entails to get the horse/child to progress. They only see the bottom line and expect you to be able to magic the impossible. They have no idea of the tremendous amount of time/energy/talent it takes to train horses or kids or they wouldn’t need to hire a trainer in the first place.
my wife is great at riding my horse
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cuz everyone is an expert when it comes to horses….
or so they think
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i know they just think they know everything don’t they?
i hope i helped you out ! 
someday, it will blow up in their face if they’re horse gets sick or if their child falls off ..
that’s pretty awesome that you’re training arabians, they are wonderful !
my advice to you is, don’t let those people frustrate you. You’re helping them aren’t you? well, if they think they don’t need your advice, just say "fine" or "whatever"
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Most times, unsolicited advice is unwanted. Even if an opinion is requested, if it differs from what they want to hear, it will often be written off as wrong. Just the way people work, in the horse world and the rest of the world.
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I don’t think it’s just training, I think it’s child rearing and every other subject under the sun where people to profess to being experts.
You can only help people so much and if they refuse to take advice and help, then leave them to it and move onto the next one that does want to move forward. Frustrating I know but apart from shaking them and telling them to get a grip and listen, not much else you can do.
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I hear ya! Everybody’s a trainer now days! heres the way I see it, if you train for a living, meaning its your only job, make a good living at it, have crudentials, then I consider you a pro trainer! The reast are wal mart wanna be trainers. Make sense? I,m not a trainer, shoer or vet, and dont claim to be. I leave all that up to the pro’s!
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I used to teach and had found the best success for me was by asking the student or new owner questions to the point that they thought what we talked about was their idea. Make them really feel a part of the decision. Let them convince themselves that their daughter or son can go further with a very well disciplined "aged" horse, vs. "the flashy three year old that they couldn’t pass up cuz the deal was so good and they had to take it right then or someone else was looking at it right after you and was bringing cash." How many broken bones did it take to figure that out?
We as teachers can only guide and direct – it’s up to the person to do with this information however they want to. But how it is presented to them can make a big difference in their decision. Same as teaching the horse – how it is presented to them can make a big difference in their response for you.
Add a little more patience to the ingredients and you will feel better. Remember too – change the things you can, accept the things you cannot change and have the wisdom to know the difference. You may only need to change your approach.
Good luck!
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I have the same problem I some times worry about the saftey, but I have come to the turms of just letting them learn for themselves it is hard but also some just need to try and see what is best by themselves I hope this helps good luck
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I give lessons to alot of ppl the same way!
Maybe some people want to baby their children, lol, but idk…sorry
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If anyone needs tips on western riding or anything else realted to horses, cats, or dogs, you can im me at on Yahoo! IM or Aol IM at:
Yahoo IM-sconnolly05
Aol IM-swanlyteva
Well, that’s the horse world….two horsemen, three opinions….
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I feel your pain and resolved my own by firing those clients. I make my clients sign a contract straight away that says I have eminent domain over safety standards that apply to the show arena. I have left clients at shows after deciding that the heated argument was not worth it. I have told them they can probably find another trainer who agrees with them and for the right price willgladly take their money. I have even told parents that I am sorry to care for their child’s safety more than they do. I have had people enter their kids in jumping classes after negotiating x-rails on the lunge. I have had people enter their walk trot rider in -W-T-C classes so they would have more to enter at shows only to call the ambulance.
I have also had to tell people that the horse that was great for walk trot may not be suitable for W-T-C classes or that they outfit was not appropriate. I have had people show up for their classes in flannel shirts and old jeans expecting to get the judges eye.
Parents sometimes have a hard time not being the expert. I set the tone and the pace from the very first lesson that I am the expert, what I say goes, what I decide goes, and if they disagreed, we either needed to change the goals or they needed to find another trainer.
Hard row to hoe sometimes.
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me a pro since 1990
seems to be a little bit of both know-it-allism and i only want to her what i wantitis. i lost a training client this spring becuase she wanted me to break her yearling arab filly for her beginner daughter (girls about 10) poor baby was malnurished to begin with and she wanted it broke in 60 days. i refused and she found a hefty full grown man to do it for her. hopefully no one gets hurt, but somehow i doubt it.
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A lot of people don’t want to go to the next level. This is a recreational activity for their children or themselves when they are the owners. For some of us, its a way of life, a job even. For clients its a fraction of their time. It may be that they don’t want to dedicate more time to it or they don’t want to dedicate more money.
Even if the child or horse has the talent, the parent or owners may not see it as a worthwhile investment. They may think the child will grow out of it or they don’t need the ribbons. They may think "what is the point," in investing if their immediate desire to ride is satiated by lessons or local shows.
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I know what you mean. A lot of parents these days seem to think they know everything and that even though you are their trainer they know what should really be done. All you can do is cope, I guess.
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Some of these clients really see themselves as the "boss". They are paying you, the "employee" to do the job as they see fit. Which is usually not going to work as they don’t know a thing about your job, or what it entails to get the horse/child to progress. They only see the bottom line and expect you to be able to magic the impossible. They have no idea of the tremendous amount of time/energy/talent it takes to train horses or kids or they wouldn’t need to hire a trainer in the first place.
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Fellow trainer.